Saturday, June 6, 2009

Pasha Stanford sends -

My Angel Inflight
Writing this was really hard.The way u became close to my heart was not because of something you did when u were being your normal funny self, but because i personally experienced the real hero in u when u saved me on one of the saddest days of my life. Everyday i have kept this memory at bay because it reopens a wound in my heart that does not allow me to function at work, with my friends, and especially my family, but i need to get this out because i know it is important that anyone who doesnt know how incredibly special u were, will know and always remeber you as such.On March, Friday 13th, my brother was shot and murdered in Detroit while i was working an overnight in Denver. It was one of the saddest days in my life. What was the hardest part was trying to keep a set face in the van that morning when i told u, my captain that day, and the rest of the crew that i was in contact with crew support trying to get home to my family in Detroit and having little luck. All the flights were booked.Even for positive spacing.Finally i told u that i was going to just work the flight back to Chicago to get back home.I never expected the reaction i got from u, because i had only just met you a few days before, and although i knew i instantly liked u for ur humour and silliness i never expected for someone i had just met to treat me if I was a close loved one..especially at work. U took the phone out of my hand, told crew support that there was absolutly no way i was working the flight, and that i needed to get home.U left the chicago flight to be delayed and walked me back to the Northwest flight where i had been denied a seat by the gate agent that had looked at me as if something was wrong with me when i started tearing up when he told me the flight was full and i couldnt get home. U pulled the Captain off the flight and explained to him how i needed to get home and how important it was for airline crew to take care of one another. You got me seat on that flight. U hugged me when i broke down in front of everyone. Right there. In the middle of the Northwest terminal airport. I was a complete STRANGER to u a day before that. Everyone was being so sypathetically "professional" towards me at that point. It was like i had some sort of sad disease and alhough they felt bad for me, they still were keeping up a "professional distance" from not trying to catch it. But u didnt care. i couldnt get the words out then to express how grateful i was to u.. when i said "thank-u so much gordan" it didnt and still doesnt seem hardly enough. Even a long while after when i saw u again at work i tried to express to u but i could never get it right.U just said the same thing u said to me the day u put me on the plane.. "Pasha, no need. please. I didnt do anything but what any other Captain would have done." And to this day i still dont believe that. And what breaks my heart is that u really believed that you didnt do anything "special". But EVERYONE that knows this now i know will agree that u did. Words cannot express the sorrow i feel for my brother. Words cannot express the relief i felt for the angel that God sent me that day to get to him. Words could never express how much i wanted to thanku everyday i saw u but coulndt get it out because it was too hard because u were now linked to me in a way that stirred up both grief and gratefulness in my heart when i looked at you. I know u knew it as well. Im sad that i didnt get a chance to find the words Gordan. Im sad that i didnt get to the hospital in time to see u and try to form the right words again. Im sad that u never realized that u had wings on your back and u didnt even know it your whole life :) But i am happy that everyone will truly know that u were, and are now, a true Angel...And u will forever be in my heart. When when i think of u, i will be sad Gordy. But I will try to be comforted in the fact that you are in heaven with my brother. Where all the true angels go, and are supposed to be, and are never forgotten.

4 comments:

  1. You have been blessed to have met Doogie. I can totally picture Doog helping you in your time of need without hesitation. Way to go Doogie.

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  2. Pasha,

    I am Gordon's sister Audree. As I read your post I could not stop crying. I can totally see my brother doing exactly as you described. He is a wonderful man. I can say, sadly, that I know how you were feeling after losing your brother. It is your post that makes me feel the way you did after Gordon helped you. Thank you for sharing this story with all of us. I hope to be able to meet you one day and give you a hug!! He is an ANGEL indeed.

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  3. Audree,
    i was very blessed to meet your wondeful brother. my brother was bighearted and silly :) as well. its hard but know that you have a friend in chicago that u never even met.. i hope to meet u one day and hug u back! keep smiling. no matter what. i promise it is what gets u through day by day and it gets a lil easier too. :)

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  4. Pasha,
    It is nice to know I have a friend in Chicago. You have one in Utah as well. If you are ever out this way give me a call 801-628-1558. I wish you the very best in life. Hugs to you.

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